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Experience Gifting of the Future

Things Wedding Guests Don't Care About

Are you stressing over every last detail of your wedding? Well, don’t. Read on to find out what you can skim over and your guests won’t notice, and also some things that they will.
Advice
11 minutes
Disclaimer: This blog is not directly affiliated with or sponsored by any of the products mentioned or linked in the article, nor do we receive any monetary compensation.

Photo by Samantha Gades on Unsplash: https://unsplash.com/photos/ermkZ9xvhdU

Life is getting more and more complicated.

You would think that with all of our high-tech devices and gadgets, things would get easier, but they don't. How could they when you are also forced to choose between 5 different wedding dress designs by one designer, 6 types of cake flavours, a dozen of flowers and so on. The stress doesn't end there and neither does the number of things you have to deal with.

Weddings, by nature, have a million little things to worry about, but don't let yourself feel overwhelmed by all these small details.

The problem is some items on your wedding checklist are also just plain pointless. Things no guests will even remember were there or care about. Part of being a great host is knowing which items on the wedding checklist need your attention – and which ones you really don't need to sweat over. 

As hard as you might try to please everyone, one thing is inevitable: Someone won't be happy. No matter how long you give them to RSVP or what type of wedding favours you provide, there will always be someone who complains. This can be stressful, and cause you to focus on the minutiae of your big day—when there are way more important things you should worry about. When planning your wedding, a good rule of thumb is that people don't tend to care quite as much about the small things as you think they do. 

What are some things that guests don’t care about? 

There are more than a few items on your wedding checklist that guests pay far less attention to than you think. Consider cutting back on these items and save yourself the headache by knowing what matters to your guests, and what doesn't. 

Ceremony Programs 

Ceremony programs are one of those aspects of wedding planning that can easily be done away with. Let's face it, your guests will likely check out the program once and then toss it in the recycling bin.🗑️ These days, most people have a smartphone or tablet and can refer to them for updates on ceremony times and other details. 

If you still want to remind guests about the schedule for the day or provide them with some interesting information about the bride and groom, consider creating a display board where they can be posted — you can use chalkboards, bulletin boards or even a corkboard. 

This way, your wedding party won't look like they're handing out flyers at an event (unless you really want that vibe), and they won't take up space in guests' pockets. You don't need to spend a ton of money (or any) on programs just to satisfy some outdated convention. 

Table Linens 

Sure, if your linens are ugly, stained or cheap-looking, your guests will notice — and it'll distract from everything else. But as long as your linens do their job and look decent, nobody's going to pay attention to them.

They'll be too busy enjoying their meal or listening to the band play in order to notice if your table linens are silk or polyester. Table linens are not cheap, but they can also be entirely unnecessary. If you have a gorgeous wooden table or a lovely fabric on your chairs, decorate with centrepieces, napkin rings and other items that add to the overall look and feel of the tablescape. 

Don't choose a tablecloth colour and pattern just because it matches your bridesmaid dresses or your wedding flowers. Wedding guests might not notice the difference between a $5 table cloth and one that costs $75, so don't blow your budget on something they likely won't even look at. Check out our best tips on saving money at your wedding here.

The Bouquet/Garter Toss 

While this tradition may have originated in an effort to ward off evil spirits or stop guests from stealing pieces of the bride's dress for good luck, today it's just an excuse for single people to mingle and have a laugh with each other. It's not something anyone will remember in 15 years; if you skip this tradition, no one will notice or care. And if you're expecting single women to go crazy over the bouquet toss or single men to get excited over catching the garter belt, you might be disappointed. 

There is nothing more awkward than watching people pretend they want to catch a bouquet or take a garter off of someone's leg.💐 This is an outdated tradition that has been left behind by more modern and inclusive weddings, and it is never worth it to make your guests uncomfortable. If you want to throw something, throw confetti or glitter bombs or streamers. Make sure that whatever you are throwing isn't sharp and might hurt someone's eyes (like rice), and make sure whatever you're throwing isn't going to be gross and slippery if it lands on the floor (like rose petals). 

This tradition is becoming less and less popular with women at weddings.

It's a hassle to make sure you're on the dance floor when the bouquet gets thrown, and once it's in the air, everyone scrambles for it as if there's a prize at the end of it. Sure, it's fun to watch everyone go for it, but this event doesn't make or break a wedding day. 

Wedding Favours 

The cute little gifts you give to your guests on their way out might seem like a really nice gesture, but chances are they'll be left behind or forgotten about. It's not because they're not appreciated, it's just that the majority of people don't really care that much about them. At the end of the night, when all the food has been eaten and all the booze has been drunk, nobody is going to notice if you didn't hand out wedding favours.

They're nice if you can afford them and think they're necessary - a small gift from you to say "thanks for coming!" - but don't feel bad if you skip them. Your guests won't even notice! I've seen so many couples spend way too much time on their wedding favours, only to have them left behind at the end of the night. If you really want to give something small to your guests, check out local candy shops or chocolate shops that sell items in bulk. 

Wedding Invitations/Calligraphy 

If you have a wedding coming up, chances are you've had at least one conversation about exactly how much your guests care about things like invitations, seating charts, and what kind of font you use for the calligraphy on the envelopes.💌 

The answer is: They don't care. Unless you're having a small, intimate wedding with only close friends and family, odds are that people are going to show up no matter what. And the number of people who will have an opinion on your stationery is probably less than 5 percent. 

If you want to save money and paper — which is a good idea! — there are a number of ways to keep wedding costs down while getting the information out. 

Go digital with an online invitation site. You'll save money on paper, postage and printing fees, plus the invitation can be much more interactive than a paper invitation. You can include a link or scannable QR code to your Evstry registry, where you can collect RSVPs and guest counts, keep your gifts secure, and provide details on timing and dates, all within one platform. Check out our past blog post on how to avoid gift theft here.

So, what do guests care about? 

Guests have seen a million weddings already. Yours doesn't need to be completely unique. After all, it's about the couple getting married, not about impressing the guests. Guests won't care if you don't have a theme or if you borrow ideas from other weddings they've been to. That said, there are plenty of ways you can make your day memorable for everyone involved and repurpose your energy to focus on some things guests do care about.

Here are a few: 

The Ceremony 

Your guests will care about the ceremony, but it’s probably not at the top of their list. Everything else (food, venue, music) takes a backseat to the one thing that is truly at the heart of your wedding: you and your fiancé. It may seem like your wedding is all about the party, but for many guests, the ceremony itself is the highlight. If you want people to take it seriously, though, make sure to keep it short and sweet. Your family and friends made the effort to be there for this momentous occasion in your life. Make sure they enjoy it!

This is where hiring a professional officiant comes in handy: You'll feel more comfortable and confident knowing someone else is responsible for running the show. Plus, an experienced officiant can also help you create a personalized ceremony that reflects who you are as a couple (and keep it to under 20 minutes). A lengthy ceremony can make even devout guests restless, and there's nothing worse than fidgety guests during such a special moment. 

Food 

The best weddings I've ever been to were the ones with great food (not only for dinner but also for cocktail hour and dessert).🤤 Guests don't really care if you had a sit-down meal, a buffet or passed hors d'oeuvres. What they care about is whether there was enough food, whether it was tasty and whether it was served at the right temperature. If everyone else is eating chicken and you can barely find any on your plate, that's a problem. And if it's cold? Forget about it. Don't stint on the quality of your food because your guests will be very vocal about it if they don't enjoy their meals. 

Approximately 88 percent of guests said food is one of their top three priorities when attending a wedding. WeddingWire also found that 71 percent of guests who weren't satisfied with their wedding experience cited the food as the reason. 

The couple’s entrance 

From the moment guests arrive, they'll be excited to see the bride and groom. If you're doing a grand entrance, let everyone know when it will happen so they can get ready. The entrance includes the bride's dress. It's always one of the most anticipated parts of the day and everyone wants to see what they're wearing, even if they've already seen it before! 

The couple's entrance is a great way to start off the reception and it sets the tone for the rest of the night. Your guests want to see you and your partner's expressions as you see each other for the first time on your wedding day.

The couple's entrance holds a lot of significance as it kicks off all the wedding festivities. This is when everyone present at the party gets a chance to see them and bless them for their new beginning.

The bride and groom look happy together during their entrance which makes this moment special for everyone witnessing it. 

In general, people don't care about most of the things you spend time fretting over. (Guilty as charged!) It's so easy to get wrapped up in wedding planning details that we forget that people are just happy to be invited to a party celebrating our love and commitment.

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